A Prehistoric Take: Toronto Maple Leafs Reimagined as Dinosaurs

General view of nimatronic dinosaurs on display (Photo by Daniel Knighton/Getty Images)
General view of nimatronic dinosaurs on display (Photo by Daniel Knighton/Getty Images)

Despite what very young fans believe, the Toronto Maple Leafs haven’t existed since dinosaurs roamed the lands.

However, in this latest version of re-imagining the Toronto Maple Leafs, we wonder what would happen if we took the Buds to prehistoric times.

Paleontologists Leafs fans, this is for you.

Before going back to the Mesozoic Era, take a moment to catch up on the previous versions of the Maple Leafs reimagined. Read about who the Leafs would be if they were Disney Princesses, if they were the cast of Seinfeld, or if they were hot peppers.

The Toronto Maple Leafs as Dinosaurs

Turning back the clock, Maple Leafs Sports and Entertainment’s Toronto Raptors would fit right in with this Jurassic world.

There’s no need for skates here with players able to use the edges of their sharp claws to navigate themselves on ice. But this isn’t about the Raptors, it’s the Maple Leafs… as dinosaurs.

The team logo would need an upgrade of course. It could still remain a blue maple leaf, only it would be getting munched on by an apatosaurus (formerly known as a brontosaurus).

The players themselves would of course be dinosaurs. The big four would terrorize opponents. Auston Matthews would be the feared tyrannosaurus Rex. Mitch Marner, with his speed and agility, would be a velociraptor. John Tavares may tear through his jersey as a stegosaurus.
William Nylander would continue to fly through the competition as a pterodactyl.

The forwards would make up a variety of other dinosaurs. Alexander Kerfoot would be a Triceratops, Noel Acciari an ankylosaurus, Calle Jarkrok a dilophosaurus, David Kampf an allosaurus, Michael Bunting a compsognathus, Sam Lafferty a pachycephalosaurus, Zach Aston-Reese an Iguanodon, and Ryan O’Rielly would be a deinonychus.

The defenders would patrol in pairs of dinosaurs. The first grouping would see two spinosauruses followed by a couple of diplodocuses. The third pairing would be styracosauruses.

Between the pipes would be Ilya Samsonov in his current human form. He’s both scary and fierce enough the way he is to fit in nicely on the ice.

Carlton the Bear would not look like himself either. The team mascot would also undergo a prehistoric transformation. Carlton the friendly dinosaur would still delight the fans with silly antics and elaborate costumes, only from time to time he’ll stop and feed on someone in the arena watching the action. Not to worry Leafs fans, Carlton only eats those rooting for the opposition.

Upon entering Scotiabank Arena (the barn’s name won’t change because the Leafs still want those large advertising cheques), fans could expect to be transported back to the Jurassic era, with prehistoric landscapes and dino-mite sound effects to really create a special in-game experience.

And what’s a dinosaur-themed hockey team without a roaring goal horn and goal song? The team’s rendition of “You Make My Dream (Come True)” will be replaced with the boom boom acka lacka boom booms of “Walk the Dinosaur” by Was (Not Was).

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So, are you ready to join the Toronto Maple Leafs on their journey to rule the ice age? Grab your Jurassic gear and get ready for a prehistoric good time at the rink!