Toronto Maple Leafs: Patrick Kane and the Return of Plus/Minus
The Toronto Maple Leafs open training camp in just a few days.
Currently enveloped in some kind of Prospect Tournament, the Toronto Maple Leafs will open their proper training camp next week and play their first game on the 24th.
If you are a Leafs fan, this is really good news.
If you run a Leafs website and have to come up with entertaining topics day in and day out, it’s the best news.
In the meantime, let us cast back to an old favorite: the Plus/Minus format whereby we take the NHL’s worst and most meaningless statistic and use it to rate things we noticed in the last week or so.
This award winning segment is brought to you by Hamburger Phones – no you can’t eat em.
Toronto Maple Leafs Plus/Minus
PLUS: As think I already mentioned, the return of hockey next week.
Minus: Ads on jerseys. Disgusting.
Double Minus: The horrible take I keep hearing about how there are already ads everywhere so we shouldn’t care. I don’t care how much the NHL sells its soul, ads on jerseys are an abomination that shows the ultimate disrespect for fans and the game.
PLUS: And Justice for All. I am not much of a metal fan, and even though I have the largest CD library I’ve ever seen in real life, it took me over 30 years of collecting to finally get to Justice.
A weird quirk I have is that if I don’t own the CD, I probably haven’t listened to it. So while I had virtually all other Metallica albums, I’d never heard what turns out to be their best album.
And Justice for All is the best mix of ambition and technical abilities that I’ve ever seen outside of a Thomas Pynchon book. It is one of the few records I’ve ever given a 10 out of 10 to.
MINUS: The lack of excitement for this Toronto Maple Leafs team. I know they’ve let you down over and over and over, but this roster is crazy and I really think we should be happy that we have a chance to watch it.
PLUS: Speaking of 10 out of 10s, another album I give that most prestigious of compliments to is Lucinda Williams Car Wheels on a Gravel Road.
PLUS: The Patrick Kane to the Leafs rumours. The kind of late-summer fun I didn’t know I needed. Kane is the perfect fit for this team and he’s great friends with everyone’s favorite Bro, Auston Matthews. I say the team owes it to us to make this happen.
PLUS: I just watched the movie Devil in a Blue Dress . It’s only 30 years old so I won’t give any spoilers, but I must say, I am surprised about how many great movies just vanished from our collective consciousness. This should be considered one of the best movies of the 90s. Run, don’t walk, to your nearest video rental store and see if it’s in!
MINUS: Jake Muzzin and Alex Kerfoot and Rasmus Sandin. They’re all just sitting around waiting for something to happen. Don’t leave em hanging.
PLUS: You are right to wonder what other albums I give a 10 out of 10 to, so here is a list: American Beauty, Low, Kid A, The Queen Is Dead, Darkness on the Edge of Town, And Justice for All, Paul’s Boutique, Achtung Baby, In Utero, Disintegration, Big Chair, Pet Sounds, Blonde on Blonde, Relationship of Command, Since I left You, Car Wheels on a Gravel Road, Nothings Shocking, Soft Bulletin, Ready to Die, Soup, Being There, Bossanova, Doolittle, Dirt, Jagged Little Pill and like 5 Prince and Dylan records.
MINUS: The Jets stripping their captain and also hiring Rick Bowness.
PLUS: Aaron Judge. That guy is a freak!
PLUS: The Toronto Blue Jays.
PLUS: Letting Campbell and Mikheyev walk.
PLUS: Every time you remember that the Leafs have Mark Giordano. Possibly on the NHL’s most team-friendly contract.
Next. Leafs Player Grades for Last Year's Regular Season and Playoffs. dark
MINUS: The fact that Sandin isn’t signed yet.
PLUS: The Dirt Chickens, Sade, Glen Gould and James Elroy. And of course, hockey starting soon.